Most cultures and religions have significant days or periods in the calendar year; in this part of the world, several converge in the late December/early January period. Winter solstice, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, and New Year’s are some of them.
This is potentially challenging, given the possibility for competing demands, conflicting expectations, financial stresses, and social/personal circumstances. Fortunately, there are tools, reframes, and resources that can help us to navigate this season intact and whole rather than frazzled and depleted! Here are some that can help.
1. Know yourself
Recognize what this season is like for you. In nature, the winter season is generally associated with quiet reflection, rest, and renewal. It can be a stretch for some of us to shift from this into social celebration mode.
Identify ways to support yourself in any situations or environments that are typically difficult. This can include deciding in advance how long you’ll stay somewhere, or how you’ll handle tricky relationships as effectively as possible.
2. Get your priorities straight
Many people experience competing demands during the holiday season. Other people may be more solitary, whether by choice or happenstance. Regardless, it’s helpful to identify what matters most and what matters least, even if you keep these lists to yourself.
One approach is to distinguish between what you believe you should do and what you actually want to do. Both of these are at play, and neglecting one can leave us off-kilter. For example, ignoring what you prefer to do can leave you resentful or unfulfilled; however, sometimes that’s a cost you may be willing to pay in order to maintain a family tradition. This can help you decide how you’ll spend your time, energy, and resources; it’s like installing a personal compass.
3. Set boundaries
Even if you’re clear about how you prefer to approach the holiday season, you’re not alone. Everyone has their own preferences. This is where boundaries become so vital. The challenge is to see how your preferences can fit with someone else’s, ideally so that no one is disregarded, disrespected, or ignored.
Your body will give you clues as to how well you’re accomplishing this process: if you’re tired or short-tempered, something may not be working well; if you’re relaxed, present, and energized, this is probably working for you.
4. Try a stress buster
Identify what helps you be centered, rested, and clear-headed. These are some things that may help:
- meditation
- nature walks
- napping
- listening to music
- hot bath
- sipping fragrant tea
- yoga or tai chi
- journaling
5. Lean into the potential
The holiday season is a time of potential. So many people and faiths focus on this season for the opportunity to honor, celebrate, reflect, commune, pray, play, and center. Look for ways to keep yourself well, now and always.
By Carole Ames